I watched a toddler fall in the pool a few weeks ago, and I'm still freaking out.

It does happen. We even had MsI fall into one of the wading pools on her scooter once. She was just going down the main path and couldn't get stopped in time. The ground was a little wet and there is no barrier between the pool and the path. Thankfully the pool she fell in was only 1 foot deep. She was banged up from bashing into her scooter when she landed, but she stood up in the pool herself before I could even get to her. We've seen other kids lose their scooters into the pond and the pool, but in those cases they fell off so that they don't end up in the water too.

My hardest transition to living in Singapore was water safety.  There is absolutely none here. There are no fences around pools. Ponds and water features are such a part of the landscape that paths go right through them. I've seen houses here where water features are an integral part of the interior of the house, let alone the ones out in the garden. Ditches flood when it rains here, turning from a trickle to a torrent in minutes.

For a long time I was in a constant panic when we were outside, worrying that someone would drown, and not just my kids - all the children everywhere. Our Rental Agent told us "Do not let children play outside alone. There are no fences around pools. Get them into swimming lessons soon." No one else seems concerned. Even the Agent was merely pointing out the difference between North America and Singapore to ensure we were aware.

There is a playground at our condo is right beside the pool, without even a hedge between. Toddlers toddle beside the pool. No one wears life jackets. Occasionally you will see a child in inflatable armbands without anyone beside them; that scares me to no end. There's no "keep you kids within arms reach" philosophy here and many people aren't worried about keeping the kids even in sight once they learn to swim.

Kids as young as 8 years old are swimming in the pool without adults. And, I mean that their adults are at home. Lots of kids go for a swim alone or more often with a similarly aged child.

I don't even let our kids go swimming with their friends and their parents. If someone invites them swimming, I go too to supervise. I know people think I'm a bit paranoid. I have noticed that I haven't been quite as worried about all the water once our kids became solid swimmers.

I still watch our kids like a hawk, and I try to be aware of those other toddlers playing by the pool too. MsC, at 8 years old, can swim 100 meters. MsI, at 3 years old, can swim 22 meters on her front and then after a momentary break swim 22 meters on her back. MsE can swim a length somewhere in between the other 2 girls and can touch the bottom of all but one of the pools at our condo.

But back to my story. It was a lovely sunny morning and we were swimming at the pool closest to our condo; the one we call "The Mermaid Pool". There were 2 other families there, and all the kids present were playing together in the water. We'd been at the pool quite a while, so Jonathan and I were lounging on the lawn chairs drying off before we took everyone home for lunch. Jonathan was facing away from the pool, but he knew I was intentionally watching our 3 kids in the pool.

A 2 or 3 year old came up the path towards the pool on her scooter and slipped right into the pool. Scooter and all - it barely made a sound. There was no scream, no splash, just a tiny little Sploosh. The 2 adults in the pool didn't notice a thing. None of the children in the pool saw it happen. MsE was maybe 5 feet from where the girl fell in or I might not have seen it myself.

Jonathan says, I said "Oh! Oh!," and then I leapt off my lawn chair, ran and jumped in the pool. I'm not a fast swimmer, and I remember thinking this pool is much too wide and I am much too slow. It was clear the girl couldn't swim. I could see her little hands just barely breaking the surface as she tried to grab a hold of anything. I floundered across as quickly as I could - half swimming, half wading. Her mom came running up and we got to the girl at about the same time. Her Mom hauled her out of the water by her arms and I handed up the scooter.

The little girl seemed fine. She wasn't sputtering, so she must have know enough to hold her breath. Her mom was obviously quite upset and after a few moments they hurried away and I haven't heard anything more about it.

There were 6 adults and 6 children present, and only 1 of those 12 realized a child was drowning. I'm certain her Mom didn't see her fall in, because she wasn't running until I was halfway across the pool.

The main path they came down meets the pool like a T. It's a completely blind corner. The path goes to the right or the left along the pools edge (no fence, not even a ledge). In fact the decking is about a foot above the waterline so there is no way to see if someone has fallen in the water until you are right at the pool. Lots of times I've had even my own kids ahead of me on the path reach the pool and I've missed seeing the one second it takes for them to turn the corner and be out of sight, and I don't really know if they've made the turn or fallen in until I make the turn myself.

I can see this pool out our condo windows. I see this scenario every day, all day long: child reaches the pool's edge way ahead of their adult and then they thankfully turn the blind corner. A few minutes later, their adult strolls by and can then see they turned the corner.

I've sat drinking Kopi on the patio many mornings since we moved in almost 2 years ago, wondering what I would do if I saw a child fall in the pool. The pool is too far away for me to get there in a reasonable amount of time.

We left the pool shortly after the incident and talked about what to do if someone needs help in the pool. I felt really bad that I hadn't shouted something to bring attention to the girl in the pool, before I jumped in. All the adults there were about the same distance as me away from the child, but perhaps those adults in the pool would have been faster swimmers. Although they both had small children with them, so they might not have gotten there any faster.

We reminded our girls about how kids can't really help a child who needs help in the water, because they could get pulled under the water with them. We've practiced what to do if that ever happened. Instead, were reminded that they need to get an adult through whatever means necessary.

We all decided that shouting "Help! Baby in the Pool," regardless of the age of the child should be pretty effective at getting immediate attention to the pool. There are a number of ground floor patios that open onto the pool deck. Most of those condo have their windows and doors open all the time. Most homes here have someone home all the time (at least during Covid). The patio suites would definitely hear someone calling for help at the pool.